Back in July of 2019, Matt Brown and Tollie Bell were on top of the world and felt completely in control of their common destiny.
They had just gotten engaged at the historic Cavalier Hotel in Virginia Beach, Va., with all of their parents and siblings in attendance to celebrate, and they felt secure in setting a wedding date for Sept. 12, 2020.
Their wedding venue would be at Keswick Vineyards in Charlottesville, Va., not far from the University of Virginia campus where they’d first met and fallen in love six years earlier.
But by last March, as they were preparing to mail “Save the Date” cards to their estimated 200 guests, Matt and Tollie were starting to realize that their dream wedding might have to be put on hold due to the growing pandemic.
“We kept writing and talking to our vendors,” recalls Matt, 28, who grew up in the Owings Mills area and attended McDonogh School and Baltimore Hebrew Congregation. “By May, we saw the [pandemic] numbers, especially on the East Coast where our families are, so we felt [having the wedding] was risky. We didn’t know where the world was going, and people didn’t feel safe. So we made the call in May [to postpone].”
Says Tollie, 27, a Norfolk native who now lives with Matt in San Francisco: “Some of the vendors were easier to deal with than others. It was a stressful few weeks just managing everything, but it all worked out.”
It’s a scenario that neither Matt nor Tollie could’ve envisioned when they first met through mutual friends on their picturesque Charlottesville college campus.
“We met during exams in our sophomore year and took business classes together, and then stayed in touch over the summer cross-country, talking all the time and FaceTiming,” says Matt, who works for a venture capital fund.
Says Tollie, who works for a private equity firm: “We really started dating when we got back to school after the summer. He’s my best friend and we get along really well. We’re pretty compatible, and we love each other’s families. Our parents even hang out sometimes when we’re not there. It’s great.”
After college, Matt and Tollie managed for a while to have a long-distance relationship — he was living in New York while she was in Washington, D.C. But eventually, Tollie moved to San Francisco for a new job, and they knew it was a make-or-break moment for their relationship.
“That was just too challenging,” says Matt, who wound up negotiating with his firm to open a Bay Area office and let him oversee the operation.
“I just came back to New York once a month on a red-eye, and Tollie and I lived together in San Francisco,” he says. “It was just great to finally be together. Living in a place like San Francisco, where there are so many things to do and explore, was great. Lots of camping trips and hikes.”
Matt and Tollie now plan to get hitched on Aug. 28, 2021, hopefully before the same number of guests as they originally anticipated, at Keswick Vineyards.
“I just want to get married to Matt and celebrate and be with my family and friends,” says Tollie. “This whole thing has put everything into perspective for me. The tablecloths and flowers and all the little [wedding] details seem very small to me now.”
Matt says he knows other couples who recently married via Zoom and plan to hold their in-person nuptials at a later date when the pandemic subsides. “We just felt that we wanted to do it all-in-one and not wait again,” he says
With the national vaccination process still moving slowly, Matt and Tollie admit they’re not certain if their dream wedding will take place exactly in the manner they’re hoping.
“We’re mentally prepared for less than 200 guests,” Matt says.
But Tollie notes that they plan to get married this year, no matter what.
“I don’t think we would postpone a second time,” she says. “I think we’ll have at least some people in attendance, especially since it’s outdoors. We’ll know more in the spring. But we’re determined to get married this year, and we just can’t wait.”
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