Hailey Garfinkel never thought she’d spend the majority of her junior year of college at home in Owings Mills.
But when the pandemic shut down the world in March of 2020, Garfinkel, 21, packed up and left the University of Georgia. When she returned to Baltimore, she didn’t know what to do next. That’s when she realized many of her friends were in the same situation, so she started Hailey’s Healthy Hangouts.
“I have a lot of friends with disabilities, and during quarantine I would talk to their parents who would say they didn’t know what to do,” she says. “A lot of them were gaining weight at a rapid pace, some were showing aggressive behaviors when they weren’t violent before and some lost the smiles on their faces. I started thinking about what I could do to help and decided to start a virtual workout group for all of us.”
Garfinkel brought her idea to a group of six friends, all of whom have Down syndrome, and together they began doing virtual group workouts followed hangout sessions.
“Everyone wanted social interactions, so we spent an hour working out and then an hour talking about how we felt during quarantine,” says Garfinkel, who is majoring in human development and family science, with a minor in disabilities studies. “The group was able to express their feelings, rant and vent. During our time together, I realized even I needed that. I have anxiety, and when quarantine happened, I wanted to shut down. But this gave me something to look forward to. It helped calm my anxieties knowing I had meaning and purpose in life. I was able to get my feelings out and it became almost like a therapy session for me as well.”
After seeing success with the small group, Garfinkel believed Hailey’s Healthy Hangouts could turn into something even bigger. She posted about the group on Facebook and through word of mouth built the group to a total of 35 participants from California, Georgia, Michigan, Florida and Maryland.
What started as a small gathering quickly grew into a loving community.
“People in the group have different disabilities, but it doesn’t matter. They all have group text message chats and talk all the time, even without me,” says Garfinkel. “It’s truly amazing and the coolest thing. Also, two sets of relationships have occurred between people who met through the zooms and are now virtually dating; their parents tell me they are ecstatic their kids can say they are in a relationship with someone. And I had one participant tell me she’s never talked to people this much, that she would come home from school and have no one to talk to and now she has a whole group of friends she chooses to actively speak to.”
Garfinkel’s involvement in the disabilities community started well before Hailey’s Healthy Hangout.
“I was diagnosed with hearing loss at 5 and got hearing aids at 16,” she says. “Once I got my hearing aids, people started treating me different and looking at me differently despite the fact my hearing aids were barely visible. I gained insight into what people with disabilities go through, which gave me a new perspective.”
Garfinkel remembers not wanting to get hearing aids but will never forget the first time she wore them, finally hearing what she was missing out on.
“It was a surreal moment,” she says. “I heard my mom’s voice truly for the first time and started crying. I didn’t know until then that the air had sound or that you could hear typing on a keyboard or the humming of a fan. That’s when I realized I had a disability, regardless of my preconceptions of what a disability was.”
It was also at that time, Garfinkel realized some people treated those with disabilities differently.
“I remember having a teacher who told my entire class I was the girl who asked stupid questions,” she says. “Teachers usually say no question is a stupid one, and here I had a teacher using my disability as a way to determine my ability to learn. That moment angered me and got me thinking about what people say about those who truly can’t defend themselves. I got angry and immersed myself in this field and community.”
Garfinkel got involved with Best Buddies while at Franklin High School and volunteered with students who had special needs. It was through her volunteerism over the years that Garfinkel met Michael Stec, who is now a part of Hailey’s Healthy Hangouts.
“The pandemic has been difficult for me,” says Stec, 23, who lives in Lutherville with his parents and has a diagnosis of high-functioning autism. “It has prevented me from being with my friends in person, to travel and to do some of the activities I enjoy. I am a part of Hailey’s Heathy Hangouts because I enjoy meeting new people and love doing different exercises. Hailey’s hangouts and workouts have given me a greater sense of determination and stability. The workouts made me feel stronger and empowered.”
Says his mother, Susan Stec: “Michael looks forward to these meetings. He speaks with some of the young men in the group about sports and other topics. They let each other know when games will be on and who won a game that was already played. I feel that this has helped Michael to get through the pandemic and I feel he has made some lifelong friendships.”
Now, even though Garfinkel is back at school for her senior year, Hailey’s Healthy Hangouts lives on and she spends about three hours daily calling everyone in the group for check-ins.
“It’s been a year since we started the group and everyone has gained a lot of social skills,” says Garfinkel. “When we bring in new participants, I’m no longer the one who always needs to start the conversation. Everyone participates. Individuals in the group are now hosting our events, which include games and talent shows.”
Garfinkel plans to continue Hailey’s Healthy Hangouts for as long as she can and hopes to eventually incorporate the group into her career.
“I never thought I could experience the amount of happiness and love these individuals give to me,” she says. “It’s hard to describe the amount of love they give. I’m trying not to sound stereotypical or cheesy, but the overall thing I love about what I do is I am able to see the amount of effort and motivation these individuals have to complete everyday tasks that come easily to you and me. It’s incredible to watch and see everyone’s growth.”
For information, email haileygarfinkel123@gmail.com or follow her on Instagram and direct message Hailey Garfinknel at @haileys_healthy_hangout.
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